"Pick Your Battles Very Carefully"

In my younger days I always loved a good fight and hardly ever backed away from the opportunity to prove my superior knowledge on just about any subject. Debating was just another way to seize the high ground and bury an opponent in the unquestionable logic that I was certain had come directly from God. Of course I spent virtually no time in the Proverbs of one wiser than me. Solomon wrote -
"It is to a man's honor to avoid strife, but every fool is quick to quarrel." Proverbs 20:3 NIV "It's a mark of good character to avert quarrels, but fools love to pick a fight." MSG
"Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam; so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out." Proverbs 17:14 NIV
I have found that there are times when a fight is unavoidable, but how I conduct myself by carefully choosing my words, my tone and my facial expression will usually moderate the conflict. When you think about it most change is the result of some type of conflict, so on some level, conflict can be a good thing. However one who is always "quick to quarrel" is, in Solomon's observation, a "fool". His counsel is to head off a fight before it starts.
Doing that requires a level of personal and spiritual maturity that was obviously lacking in my spirit in those days when I loved a good fight. NOW I see that people who love to pick at what they think is a flaw or weakness, who look for opportunities to sit in the judges seat or who criticize everyone but themselves, are destined for multiple health issues and will eventually die in loneliness.
Here's another wise word from Solomon that I have needed to HEAR, and I mean really HEAR, for a long time: "A gentle response defuses anger but a sharp tongue kindles a firestorm." Proverbs 15:1
Several years ago I was speaking at a youth conference and asked that gathering of young disciples of Jesus what is required in order for us to be children of God. We spent maybe 10 minutes of them calling out various things they have been taught by parents and teachers in the church. After writing all their responses on the board, things like, faith, repentance, baptism, live a good life, pray, study the Bible etc, I asked if there was anything else they could think of. No one seemed to have any further suggestions so I asked them to turn to Matthew 5 and read aloud, in unison, verse 9, "Blessed are the peacemakers for they will be called sons of God."
Now that is truly DIVINE counsel. More than ever in my life I want to be that!